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(eval 'Toast)@toast@donotsta.re (2026-08-30 15:35:46)
sometimes I think about people
my immediate impression of them is that they are weak-willed, but I think this is actually more about the distribution curve of the effort they are capable of, where the typical distribution curve is less "spiky" than mine
put differently, most people seem to be able to deal with long term consistent will-exercises much more easily than short term "do a lot of things NOW" kind of things
in large part, this is likely a consequence of the world: most IRL friction is of the long-form; the shitty commute, the boredom at work, the low-effort high-frequency cleaning, et cetera
this means that people as an aggregate will more often fail at tasks that require high amplitudes of will exertion, things like breaking chemical dependence (which is spiky initially and then gets easier and easier), directed/focused improvement (which can be concentrated in the span of a few days/weeks, OR can be very longform, with the results being very different)
it also would imply that I would struggle at things that require lower amplitudes over longer periods : and I do! task persistence after it goes from weeks to months, moderation where complete cessation is infeasible, etc; most people do not appear to struggle with this nearly as much, which just makes my "final" profile very different from theirs, with exceptions taken where I don't care about the thing itself TOO much (esp. past the initial engagement) but enjoy the process in and of itself (for example, my guitar forays, where I am not improving anywhere near the rates I was early on, because I just pick it up and play a little without any major pushes for improvement, but I do still do this regularly)
I don't know what ADHD "really is" (I'm not so sure it's a "single" thing, same as autism), and I don't think anyone can
I would say that this "spikiness" in will exertion (knowing of course that you can train will exertion in *all* directions, this is about the natural propensity) is one potential mechan

---Replies---

Blurry Moon@sun@shitposter.world (2026-08-30 15:36:25)
@toast I have shit willpower so I manage my environment to prevent situations